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Dear Church of Jesus Christ (LDS)

Christopher L. Jorgensen
P.O. Box 93042
Des Moines, IA 50393


April 24, 2008


The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
50 W. North Temple
Salt Lake City, Utah 84150


Dear Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints,

I realize Mitt Romney is out of the running for President, and I think that’s too bad, since I may have voted for him. It would have been nice to have a Republican in there that wasn’t pushing the standard Christian agenda and doctrine! But I have a question:

If Mitt had gotten the nomination, and if he’d been elected President, in the event he took a second wife, what would she be called?

Obviously, Ann Romney would have been First Lady, but what would subsequent wives be referred to as? The consensus amongst everyone I ask is “Second Lady, Third Lady, etc.,” but I was hoping you could clear this up for me.

I realize there are a lot of hypotheticals in the letter, but it’s bound to happen some day, so best to think about these things now.


Thanks,


Christopher L. Jorgensen

Sponsor:

Reply:

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints

Public Affairs Deparment

Joseph Smith Memorial Building
15 East South Temple Street
Salt Lake City, Utah 84150-6200

 

 

Dear Christopher Jorgensen:

There seems to be some misunderstanding of LDS doctrine & practice in your letter. The LDS church does not practice plurality of wives…hence Mitt Romney has only one wife. Were he to have others, he would not be a member of the LDS church.

I doubt that a person with more than one spouse would ever be elected to the presidency as such unions are against the law. Should that hypothetically happen years from now (law change not withstanding) your question would be answered by the U.S. government.

[signed]

Tom Owen

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Church of Jesus Christ (LDS) website: www.lds.org

Scan of the letter from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints

Commentary:

My letter was sent to:

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints
50 W. North Temple
Salt Lake City, Utah 84150

But guess this got to the right guy!

Of all the letters I have written so far this is the one I most expected to come back calling me an ignorant jerk, but instead I get a polite, sincere, handwritten and informative letter that actually addresses my questions! Sure, I pretty much knew the answers to my own questions before I wrote, but rather than a form letter thanking me for my interest in their organization (and included religious tracts trying to sell me an afterlife), I got the above.

Do I want my letters to be read? Do I want replies? Yes and no. Or more accurately, no and yes. I don’t care if the letters are read. They are intended for this site as soon as they are sent out the door. Sure, they are also intended to tweak the recipient, but I am more interested in the reply I will get back than any other part of this process. I love pulling the letters (or packages) from my mailbox. So it’s usually a surprise when I can tell someone carefully considered how to reply (30+ responses so far and I believe only a few of my letters were actually read).

So I want to take a second to apologize to Mr. Tom Owen and The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints. Religion is easy enough to make fun of without perpetuating stereotypes. This wasn’t my intention (I was just going for the obvious joke). I hope that with the inclusion of Mr. Owen’s reply, and my track record of being an oblivious ass, that this post in no way contributes to furthering this particular form of bigotry.

As with any religion there are enough silly doctrines and practices to make an outsider giggle when examined critically, but there wouldn’t have been a joke if I had taken the high road.

Here’s to the low road!

By Christopher L. Jorgensen

Website: http://jackassletters.com

Have a comment? Put a stamp on an envelope and drop it in the mail to:

Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

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