Click to subscribe to the jackassletters.com RSS feed Click to be taken to the jackassletters.com twitter page. Click to be taken to the jackassletters.com Facebook page Click to subscribe to the jackassletters.com podcast Click to be taken to the jackassletters.com YouTube channel

Dear Puddles Pity Party

Christopher L. Jorgensen
P.O. Box 546
Ames, IA 50010


April 14, 2015


Puddles Pity Party
PO Box 374
Avondale Estates GA 30002


Dear Puddles Pity Party,

Enclosed you will find a not so crisp $10.00 for a handmade Puddles Crown. I would like it to be puppet sized, so if you make me one for a small child this should work just fine! If they are one-size-fits-all then I will make do with whatever you send me. I would have just bought this online, but I am afraid the NSA is tracking me, and I would also like an autographed photo!

You can make the photo out to “Christopher L. Jorgensen,” since that is my name.

Every now and again someone like you comes along and I think, “Man, I wish that guy were gay,” then I remember I’m not gay, so it really wouldn’t change anything, but if both of us were gay you would totally be my type! I would totally love being sung to and then going home with a clown. What homosexual man wouldn’t love this?

I hope to make it to one of your shows, but so far you keep playing in countries I have no interest in visiting or in States rational people try to avoid. Please come to Iowa. We let gay people get married here.


Sincerely,


Christopher L. Jorgensen

p.s. A friend of mine is a member of the clown guild, which I find funny, since this makes him an honest to god card carrying clown. He doesn’t get why I think this is funny, so I question his sense of humor. So I was wondering if you were a member of the clown guild? I’d tell you my friend’s name and ask if you knew him, but I know there are just too many clowns out there for you to know them all!

 

This site in book form. Buy it now!

Reply:

To Christopher L. Jorgensen

Keep weepin’,

Puddles

Puddles Pity Party website: puddlespityparty.com

Scan of the letter from

Commentary:

I held off on posting this letter because I wanted to make a video of myself and my clown puppet singing one of Puddle’s songs to each other, or at least to get a photo of us wearing our crowns, but I’m lazy, and honestly, if it hasn’t happened in two years, it’s not happening.

I did get my crowns. He sent me two. One for me, one for my puppet.

I wish he’d written me a letter back, instead of just a postcard, but what can you do? Clowns are bastards! I probably won’t leave this letter online forever, and honestly, the C&D letter is probably being drafted as you read this! So read and share while you can!

Watch another of his videos:

 

I hope you enjoyed this letter and reply. If so, can I ask you to consider supporting the Jackass Letters Patreon page? More money means more letters. If Patreon doesn’t work for you, there’re other ways to help: Support

This letter won’t be in any book anytime soon, but other letters are, and you should buy the book! It can be had on Amazon:

 

Or find Jackass Letters: Archive Volume 1 anywhere fine, and not so fine, books are sold!

It’s only through your continued support that I can continue to offer these letters!

Please don’t make me run ads on the site.

Please.

Visit Puddle’s websites:

puddlespityparty.com and bigmikegeier.com

By Christopher L. Jorgensen

Website: http://jackassletters.com

Have a comment? Put a stamp on an envelope and drop it in the mail to:

Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

Be sure to mention what letter your comment applies to. Adding some cash with your correspondence is a good thing. You can email me at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) if you must.

Latest Replies:

Other points of interest:

Legal:


The logo of the Randazza Legal Group. Click to visit their site.

Giveaway:

Goodreads Book Giveaway

Jackass Letters by Christopher L. Jorgensen

Jackass Letters

by Christopher L. Jorgensen

Giveaway ends January 31, 2017.

See the giveaway details at Goodreads.

Enter Giveaway