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Dear Starbucks

Christopher L. Jorgensen1
P.O. Box 93042
Des Moines, IA 50393


June 9, 2008


Starbucks Corporate Offices
2401 Utah Avenue South, Suite 800
Seattle, WA 98134 USA


Dear Starbucks,

We desperately need a Starbucks in Slater, IA! Right now our only choice for a hot morning beverage is Casey’s coffee. This isn’t exactly the best coffee in the world if you know what I’m saying!

Here’s a fact that might make you interested:

According to the Slater website (http://www.slater-iowa.org) we have 1306 citizens in our little “Community United for Progress,” but it feels like at least 1326!

There’s prime real estate available located on the NE side of the intersection of highways 210 and R38 (only 6 miles from the I-35 corridor!). I am including a photo. I know it’s a “fixer upper,” but I know you have some cash for these sorts of things (I checked, it’s not on any historic rolls).

If you prefer you could start fresh right across the street! The old high school used to be here (there isn’t a “new” high school in Slater). I’ll include a photo of this area as well.

With Casey’s as your only real competitor for coffee you’d have a virtual monopoly in the Greater Slater Area!

I think it’s your moral responsibility to do this. Heck, you opened a store in Argentina and they’re like part of the Third World (aren’t they?). Contributing to small town economies is the wave of the future! You could be the Wal-Mart of coffee!


Sincerely,


Christopher L. Jorgensen

 


1 [Author’s note: Originally this letter used my home address, but I stopped giving this out after Shawn Johnson kept stopping by to meet a real famous Iowan.]

Sponsor:

Reply:

Starbucks Coffee Company
Customer Relations
P.O. Box 3717
Seattle, WA 98124-3717
800/235-2883 (800/23-LATTE)


June 14, 2008


Christopher L. Jorgensen
P.O. Box 93042
Des Moines, IA 50393


Dear Mr. Jorgensen,

Thanks so much for your suggestion regarding a potential Starbucks store location in Slater, IA.

We’re always looking for great new places to open stores, so I’d be more than happy to pass along your comments to our Store Development Team for their consideration.

Thanks for taking the time to contact us. We appreciate your interest and look forward to seeing you in our stores soon!

Sincerely,

[unsigned]

Daniel M.
Customer Relations
Starbucks Coffee Company

 

 

 

Starbucks website: www.starbucks.com

Scan of the letter from Starbucks

Commentary:

Oh how they turn on you! The girlfriend/editor praised this letter as being enthusiastic, then she comes back with, “Come on! They actually have latte in their phone number????” I guess she really wants to know, since that’s a lot of question marks (isn’t it????). She also points out poor Daniel M. (with no last name) didn’t bother to sign the letter. She calls this a “big mistake in my opinion,” and she’s right! People are going to be lining up at their local Starbucks in protest over this one. Well, either that or to get a 800/23-LATTE.

Well, we’ll see who gets the last laugh when they open a Starbucks in Slater, IA!

Oh, and here’s the pictures I sent them:

Picture of the proposed construction site.
[Click image to enlarge]

Secondary construction site.
[Click image to enlarge]

 

By Christopher L. Jorgensen

Website: http://jackassletters.com

Have a comment? Put a stamp on an envelope and drop it in the mail to:

Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

Be sure to mention what letter your comment applies to. Adding some cash with your correspondence is a good thing. You can email me at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) if you must.

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