Dear Queen Elizabeth II
Christopher L. Jorgensen1
P.O. Box 93042
Des Moines, IA 50393
May 1, 2008
Her Majesty, Queen Elizabeth II
London SW1A 1AA
Your Royal Highness,
I would be honored by an autographed photo of the portrait done by Annie Leibovitz. Would this be possible?
I try to be a good and patriotic citizen of The United States of America, but it’s a bit difficult under various administrations. Sometimes I positively yearn for a return to the days of British rule.
This gave me an idea. If you were to start investing US citizens with Titles of Nobility you could increase the number of your subjects, and we could be your voice in this country, advocating your positions on various issues. To this end, I would like to volunteer for a title of some sort. Nothing dramatic like a baron or duke, but a nice knighthood would suit me just fine!
If you feel I am worthy, just send the appropriate paperwork or whatever (I’m not really sure how this works) to the above address.
I would love to sign this letter “Your humble subject,” but until my titles arrive “sincerely” will have to do.
Christopher L. Jorgensen
1[Author’s note: Originally this letter used my home address, but I stopped giving this out because Sir Richard Branson kept dropping by and asking for a loan for a “sure thing.”]
1st August, 2008
Dear Mr. Jorgensen,
The Queen has asked me to thank you for your letter of 1st May, and I apologise for the delay in replying. Due to the high volume of mail received in recent weeks, correspondence has been dealt with in strict date order.
Her Majesty has taken note of your suggestion regarding the award of honours to US Citizens. I must tell you, however, that this not a matter on which The Queen would comment.
Owing to the many similar requests for signed photographs that are received, Her Majesty has made it a rule to give her autograph only to people known personally to her. It is therefore not possible for The Queen to do as you ask.
I am sorry to send you a disappointing reply but I am sure you will agree that it would be unfair to make any exception to this rule.
[signed with a flourish]
Mrs. Sonia Bonici
Senior Correspondence Officer
Mr. Christopher Jorgensen.
Queen Elizabeth II website: www.royal.gov.uk
Have a comment? Put a stamp on an envelope and drop it in the mail to:Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010