Take down requests and C&D letters will be forwarded to my attorney Marc J. Randazza.
Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010
October 12, 2010
Snack Factory, LLC.
P.O. Box 3562
Princeton, NJ 08543
Dear Pretzel Crisps,
I must confess, I’ve never tried your pretzel crisps before, but I sure would like to! They look tasty and crunchy and fun to eat. Are they?
I’m writing because I want to apologize for the reception your recent ad campaign has received. The negativity it has engendered is wholly undeserved and unfair. I know life isn’t supposed to be fair, but I am sure you invested good money in that marketing. Over-privileged whiney people need to grow up! What do they expect you to do, fire your marketing staff and the executives that green-lit the “You can never be too thin” campaign? That’s madness! Have you looked at the economy lately? Like these people could just go out and get other jobs! Silly overweight feminists with skin thinner than your pretzels are ruining it for the rest of us.
I say keep up the good work and f**k ‘em if they can’t take a joke!
Christopher L. Jorgensen
Thin, Crunchy Pretzel Crackers
Rethink your pretzel!™
October 20, 2010
Dear Mr. Jorgensen:
Thank you for taking the time to write to us regarding our Snack Factory Pretzel Crisps.
We appreciate your understanding and nice comments regarding our recent ads.
You can find our great product in your supermarket deli departments.
Our Modern Classic Line; Cinnamon Toast, Supreme (same as Everything flavor), Classic (same as Original flavor) and Tuscan Three Cheese will be available at your local Whole Foods Markets or Natural Markets. You may also purchase them online at www.snackaisle.com.
Please accept the enclosed care package and cents off coupons with our appreciation of your enthusiasm and support.
If you have any questions or concerns please feel free to contact us at 1-888-683-5400. Thank you.
P.S. Please visit our website at www.pretzelcrisps.com for more information on our products and to join our fan club.
Snack Factory, LLC
mail to: P. O. Box 3562 Princeton, NJ 08543
ship to: 11 Tamarack Circle Skillman, NJ 08558
p: (609) 683-5400 f: (609) 683-9595
If I had it all to do over again I would change my name to Aldo become a budget-based hitman who killed on a sliding-scale according to what people could afford and who really enjoyed his work and believed he was making the world a better place one assassination at a time.— jackassletters.com (@jackassletters) January 10, 2020