Dear My Shreddies

Christopher L. Jorgensen
P.O. Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

February 6, 2013

38 Jubilee Drive
Loughborough
Leicestershire
LE11 5XS
UK

Dear Shreddies,

My friend Anthony Imperioli has a problem I would like to help him with. He’s Canadian and farts a lot. There’s not much to be done about the being Canadian part, but the boy is gassier than all get out and sometimes I think I can smell him from here! (As you can see from my address I live in the US.) I did a search to see if there were any products to help Anthony out and I found a pharmacy in China that claims it has a pill that can make farts smell like roses. This is too good to be true or I’d order a bottle (Valentine’s Day is coming up). Suspecting the fart pill to be a lie I moved on and discovered your product! Shreddies sound nearly too good to be true, and yet plausible enough I figured I’d order a pair and suggest Anthony give ‘em a go!

I ran into two problems. 1. I can’t figure out a way to order them in the US and have them shipped to Canada. (While I could have some Shreddies delivered to me and then send them on this seems quite inefficient and probably more expensive.) 2. You only seem to have small and medium pairs available on your gift site. (While there’s a good chance Anthony could squeeze into a medium I’m guessing this would put undue and unacceptable strain on his package. I haven’t actually asked him his size —I will before placing an order— but most real men wear at least a large!)

Mostly I am writing you to see if you can help me help Anthony. Or maybe you could just let me know if the fart pill is real.

Sincerely,

Christopher L. Jorgensen