Professional Idiot: Do Not Try This At Home

Take down requests and C&D letters will be forwarded to my attorney Marc J. Randazza.

Dear Quavers

Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

October 29, 2011

Consumer Services Department
Walkers Snack Foods
4 Leycroft Road

Dear Quavers,

I saw a baby goat on the internet playing and dancing on a bucket and a stump. Imagine the cutest thing you have ever seen. Got it? Well, this is way cuter! Are you wondering why I am writing to tell you about this? Well, it’s because the goat’s name is Quaver! They named the goat after your crisps. If you don’t believe me you can do a search for “Quaver the Pygmy goat kid playing” on youtube and you should be able to find it (if you can’t find the video get an intern to help you).

I’m not sure I get naming a baby goat after a tasty snack, that seems a bit wrong to me, but people do all kinds of weird things. For example: my friend Anthony Imperioli plays with puppets on the internet and he’s supposed to be a grown man!

In my country we call crisps “potato chips,” but I bet you already knew that, what with being in the snack food business and all. We also call chips “fries” and footballers “soccer players.” “Cookies” are cookies here, but you guys call them biscuits (which sounds dumb!). Sorry, I shouldn’t be giving you an English lesson, you guys invented the language!

Anyway, I thought you’d want to know about the goat!


Christopher L. Jorgensen


Customer Services
Freephone UK: 0800 274 777
Freephone Eire: 1800 509 408
Fax: 0116 234 8691


11 November 2011

Mr C L Jorgensen
Po Box 546
IA 50010

Dear Mr Jorgensen

Thank you very much for your recent letter.

We are always very happy to receive consumer feedback and please be assured that I have forwarded your comments on to our Marketing Team for their attention.

Once again, thank you for taking the time and trouble to contact us, it is very much appreciated. If you do have any more queries, please do not hesitate to contact me again.

Yours sincerely,

Karen De Burle
Customer Services

Walkers Snack Foods Ltd, PO Box 23, Leicester, LE4 8ZU
Registered office: 1600 Arlington Business Park, Theale, RG7 45A. Registered Office: No. 2333074

Respondent Website:

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