Changing the World One Letter at a Time

Take down requests and C&D letters will be forwarded to my attorney Marc J. Randazza.

Dear RealDoll

Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

January 16, 2021

Abyss Creations
475 E. Carmel Street
San Marcos, California, 92078

Dear RealDoll,

I love the idea of a RealDoll. A woman who is beautiful, never aging, and always willing and enthusiastic without fear of rejection? What's not to love? Well, I can think of a few things: I will admit that RealDoll's are attractive, but they set off that feeling of the "Uncanny Valley" for me (maybe if I turned do the lights real low?). Also, I'm one of those unfortunate men who insists on holding an intelligent conversation with a potential mate. I would need a RealDoll that could not only pass the “Turning Test” on a good day, but hold interesting views on literature, history, art and philosophy. I can't imagine trying to have intelligent discourse with a robot prior to having intercourse with this same robot. I mean, I'm not opposed, I just doubt you're quite there yet. Lastly, I'm guessing that in the event that I was actually capable of coupling with a robot that I'd be the one that would have to do the cleaning up after? That seems fair, but nothing I am interested in doing. This is a deal breaker for me. I mean, who wants a woman that can't at least take care of herself?

It would be nice if she'd pick up around the place a bit too, and maybe make a meal or two. I mean, I'm not exactly being demanding here, but even a Roomba keeps the floors clean. I do have to admit that I am in more need of a robot maid than I am in need of a sex robot, but then you wouldn't catch me ever diddling a Roomba! (And not just because I have a good hiding place.)

The problem, as I see it, is that by the time one of these RealDolls gets smart and sophisticated enough for me to be interested they will start telling dudes like me “no” just like real women do and then we'll be right back where we started.

I, for one, welcome our new sexy robot overlords. The future looks bright!


Christopher L. Jorgensen

Points of Interest