Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

April 27, 2011

Scott Adams
200 Madison Avenue 4th Floor
New York, NY 10016

Dear Scott Adams,

Some people are questioning whether you are indeed a certified genius. In fact, some people are saying downright mean things about your intelligence! (I’m not one of these people! I believe in you Mr. Adams!) So I am writing to put this issue to rest. A simple certified photocopy of your genius certification should be all that is needed to reassure the doubters. A nominal fee to a notary public should accomplish this. Please insure this is done promptly.

This way, the next time some chick says, “That Scott Adams is a stupid fucking moronic idiot,” I can whip out my certified and notarized copy of your certificate of genius and say, “He is not! He’s a genius, see?” and stuff that certification right in her smug face!

Failure to provide said certification to the above address, by July 27, will only see me joining the ranks of those calling you a douche nozzle, putting you firmly on the same standing as Orly Taitz!

Please don’t let me down Mr. Adams.

Sincerely,

Christopher L. Jorgensen

p.s. Could you send me a little doodle as well? Nothing to elaborate.