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Dear Boudreaux’s Butt Paste

Christopher L. Jorgensen
P.O. Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

July 6, 2011

Blairex Laboratories, Inc.
dba: Boudreaux’s Butt Paste
1600 Brian Drive P.O. Box 2127
Columbus, IN 47202-2127

Dear Boudreaux’s Butt Paste,

I have this Canadian friend named Anthony Imperioli who acts all butt hurt all the time. He’s a sensitive guy and the slightest thing sets him off. There’s nothing worse than when a Canadian Italian man turns on the waterworks! Anyway, I was thinking of sending him a tub of your butt paste, but I am afraid it will get confiscated by overzealous border agents determined to keep Canada safe from wayward butt paste.

Mind you, I don’t know if he has an actual need for the stuff (it wouldn’t surprise me if their socialized medicine gives out free butt paste), but I was thinking sending him some butt paste would make the perfect point and maybe get him to man up a bit (the man shaves his chest for jimminy’s sake!). I’m guessing it’ll backfire and he’ll end up crying about getting a tub of butt paste. (I plan to still do it though).

I’d like to send him the biggest tub you have. What size would this be? I’m thinking anything over a 5 gallon bucket would be cost prohibitive to mail, but I might still consider it if you have larger.


Christopher L. Jorgensen

This site in book form. Buy it now!


[Editor’s note: My letter was returned to me. The following anonymous unsigned handwritten note was written below my letter.]

The largest Butt Paste size is a 16oz plastic tub.

Thank you
















Boudreaux’s Butt Paste website:

Scan of the letter from Boudreaux's Butt Paste


Note: Address has been updated to reflect my current P.O. Box.

Some of you may not know of Anthony Imperioli. To you I say check him out on twitter or facebook or his blog or youtube. He’s probably other places as well (wherever the cool kids hang out).

Anyone on my mailing list knows I am currently working on a project called “Jackass Letters: The Anthony Imperioli Letters.” This letter is from that collection. It won’t stay on this site forever, but I wanted you to have something new this weekend (I care about you). Once I get 30 or so replies I plan on taking all these letters (both answered and not) and put them into a collection that will be available on the iTunes iBookstore and maybe even Amazon. Some of the replies have been a hoot!


By Christopher L. Jorgensen


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Christopher L. Jorgensen
PO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

Be sure to mention what letter your comment applies to. Adding some cash with your correspondence is a good thing. You can email me at .(JavaScript must be enabled to view this email address) if you must.

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