Dear Budweiser (pt. 2)
Christopher L. Jorgensen1
P.O. Box 93042
Des Moines, IA 50393
July 17, 2008
Anheuser-Busch, Inc.
One Busch Place
St. Louis, MO 63118
Dear Budweiser,
I wrote previously (reference number: 5012116) and was told I had to call a number and tell you how old I was because you can’t market to minors. I did this and the nice woman on the phone promised you’d send me out some free stuff. I wasn’t really expecting free beer, but I thought a clydesdale ride or a free car or something would have been nice.
It’s been 10 weeks, and I am still waiting. I think we can both agree I’ve been fairly patient.
I’m almost 38, so I wasn’t lying about my age if that’s what you’re worried about. But you do realize minors are often dishonest and could lie about these things (even on the phone). Am I being neglecgted because you recently sold yourself to Belgium brewer InBev? Should I be writing them? I so totally would if you’d send me their address!
Don’t worry if you can’t send me anything now. I’ve grown quite used to a life of disappointment. Besides, I can always start drinking Warsteiner beer (Bud can become my second favorite European beer).
Sincerely,
Christopher L. Jorgensen
p.s. I don’t want to get anyone in trouble if some underpaid intern or marketing drone just stole my swag.
1 Letter originally used my home address. I no longer give this out every since the Nathan Fillion incident.
Reply:
Anheuser-Busch, Inc.
One of the Anheuser-Busch Companies
07/28/2008
[Address redacted]
Dear Mr. Jorgensen,
Thank you for writing back to Anheuser-Busch. We appreciate your continued interest in our beers.
Our records indicate that our phone representative did send a few small Bud Light items. Unfortunately, the complimentary merchandise we sometimes send as a gesture of goodwill is not permanent, and our inventory is currently depleted.
Although we are unable to re-send the items that were shipped to you (and would not be able to send the car or Clydesdale hitch ride you were expecting), we are more than happy to keep your contact information on file for future mailings.
Again, Mr. Jorgenson, thank you for keeping in touch with Anheuser-Busch. As always, please let us know if you have additional questions or comments.
Sincerely,
[signed]
Kim Burke
Manager
Customer Relationship Group
Anheuser-Busch, Inc.
5012116B
Anheuser-Busch, Inc.
One Busch Place
St. Louis, MO U.S.A. 63118-1852
Commentary:
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Christopher L. JorgensenPO Box 546
Ames, IA 50010
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Legal:
While working on the redesign of this site I noticed I’d never posted this letter. I’m correcting this. I was saddened by the sale of Budweiser to Belgium brewer InBev, since in my mind there really isn’t a more American beer. Don’t worry, I got over it.
I never did get anything from Budweiser. You know I’m telling the truth because I would have been holding it up proudly.
[Insert Picture of Me With Swag]
<--- That's all you get, because that's all I got!I do love the fact that they let me know I wasn’t getting a car or a horse, that they only sent me something small, and they weren’t even going to resend that because they were out. Just my luck. Someone sends me the last Budweiser T-shirt in existence and it gets lost.
Oh well.
By Christopher L. Jorgensen
Website: http://jackassletters.com