An Unanswered Letter to Chris Voigt

Christopher L. Jorgensen
P.O. Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

February 9, 2011

Chris Voigt
c/o 20 Potatoes A Day
108 S Interlake Road
Moses Lake, WA 98837

Dear Chris Voigt,

Have you ever heard of the Barnesville Potatoe Day festival? They have all kinds of potatoe things! The have mashed potatoe wrestling, potatoe pancakes, french fries and all kinds of other potatoe related foods and festivities. They even have a “Miss Tator Tot Pageant” which is sort of like that “Toddlers & Tiaras” show The Learning Channel has on but with a potatoe theme. Instead of tarted up girls they have tatered up girls in potatoe sack dresses. I’m guessing there’s less tantrums as well. Barnsville doesn’t have potatoe vodka though (I asked).

I read that you ate 20 potatoes a day for 60 days. I’m not very good at math, but that comes out to around 120 potatoes. This confuses me. That’s a lot of damn potatoes. When I eat a potatoe I generally eat a big russet baker with sour cream and cheese. Even if I got some pretty small potatoes I doubt I could eat more than 3 or 4. At best that leaves me 8 or 9 shy of 20. I just don’t see how a guy could do that (not that I am calling you a liar).

I’m a huge potatoe fan, but (there’s always a but) I would think this would cause trouble with your butt. I don’t want to pry, but I’m thinking 20 potatoes a day would have had to mess with your digestion pretty awful! I’d think your poo would be like meconium and smell something horrible! You don’t have to answer, but did it?

Sorry to end this missive on a negative note!

Sincerely,

Christopher L. Jorgensen