An Unanswered Letter to Pat Rothfuss

Christopher L. Jorgensen
P.O. Box 546
Ames, IA 50010

December 4, 2009

Pat Rothfuss
PO Box 186
Stevens Point, WI 54481

Dear Mr. Rothfuss,

I’d never heard of you, and you don’t know me, so I suppose that makes us pretty even, but I wanted to let you know I asked for your first book for Christmas. I won’t get it. My family never gets me the things I actually want. They always ask, “Don’t you want anything normal?” and then they get me stuff I didn’t ask for. How fair is that? I mean, which would you rather have, a kitchen appliance or a copy of your book? Well, I am guessing you already have a copy of your book, so you’re probably not the best example, but I know I don’t want another damn whisk!

Anyway, someone told me you are raising money for children and poor people that need goats and clothes and things. This sounds like a great idea. I’m thinking, “Man, it would be great to buy some hungry lonely kid a kid, but it also seems a little cruel. I mean, does he get a steadfast companion for years to come or does he eat?” Sadly, these are the things I think about. So I looked into your charity of choice, Heifer International, and found my dilemma to be beside the point, since I can’t afford $120 for a goat. The best I can do is $10 (enclosed) which only buys half a chicken, and since half a chicken would make a poor pet I’m guessing the kid will just eat it.

I’ll let you know if I get that book, and if you could let me know if the kid likes the chicken that would be cool!

Sincerely,

Christopher L. Jorgensen

p.s. You also don’t have to send the money on if you don’t want. Feel free to buy half a chicken for yourself, since I know writing doesn’t pay the best (I suggest Perkins Restaurant and Bakery).